Free Family Resource

Support and Healing Program

Supporting First Nations families through sexual violence, abuse, and incest with calm, practical, trauma-informed first steps.

If you are reading this, something serious has happened. You may feel shocked, overwhelmed, and unsure what to do. Take a breath. You are not alone.

This guide walks through the first 72 hours step by step so you can protect your child, stay grounded, and take the next right action.

Step 1: When you hear the disclosure

This is the moment everything changes. You may feel shock, anger, confusion, or disbelief. Take a breath.

Right now, you do not need to fix everything. You do not need to have all the answers. You need to listen.

●Slow your breathing down.
●Keep your voice calm.
●Listen to every word your child is telling you.
●Let them speak without interrupting.
●If you need clarity, ask gently: ‘Can you tell me again, so I understand properly?’

Your calm becomes their safety.

Step 2: Immediate safety

Act straight away. If one child has harmed another, separate them immediately.

●Do not leave them alone together.
●Move them into separate spaces.
●If needed, move one child to another safe place.

You are protecting both children, but they cannot be together right now.

Step 3: Stay steady in the middle

You may feel shock, anger, confusion, or heartbreak. This is normal.

But right now, you are the steady one. Your role is to stay calm, think clearly, and lead the next steps.

Even if you are breaking inside, your calm protects your children.

Step 4: When the child who caused harm is your child

This is one of the hardest places you will ever stand. You may be holding a child who has been harmed and a child who has caused harm at the same time.

Slow yourself down before you speak.

●Say: ‘I love you.’
●Say: ‘What happened is serious.’
●Say: ‘We are going to deal with this properly.’
●Ask calmly: ‘Can you tell me what happened?’
●Ask: ‘Has this happened before?’
●Ask: ‘Has anything happened to you?’
●Do not leave them alone if they are overwhelmed or showing extreme shame.

You can hold your child accountable and still hold them with love.

Step 5: Get help immediately

You do not have to carry this alone.

Go to an Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islander Medical Service or your local public hospital as soon as possible.

●Say: ‘Something serious has happened to my child. I need to see a doctor urgently. I need support and a referral for counselling.’
●If they do not respond with urgency, stay calm and be clear.
●Say: ‘This is urgent. My child has disclosed sexual harm. I need immediate support.’
●Ask to speak to a nurse, doctor, or Aboriginal Liaison Officer if needed.

This is not overreacting. This is protecting your child.

Step 6: What happens next

Once you ask for help, things may move quickly. This can feel overwhelming.

●Your child may be checked by a doctor.
●You may be asked questions.
●Support services may be organised.
●Police or child services may be involved.

This is about protecting your child, not punishing you.

Step 7: Keeping your family together

Many parents fear their children will be taken from them.

When you act to protect your child, seek help straight away, and follow through with support, you are showing safety and responsibility.

Taking action helps keep your family together.

Step 8: When family does not support you

You may face denial, blame, or anger from others.

●Focus on your child.
●Find safe people.
●Connect with services.
●Step away from harmful conversations.

You are allowed to choose safety.

Step 9: Setting up support

You will need support around you. Build a support circle for the days ahead.

●Counselling for your child.
●Counselling for yourself.
●Specialist support services.
●Financial support if needed.

Step 10: Your mental health matters

You may feel overwhelmed, exhausted, or alone. This is trauma.

●Talk to someone.
●Ask for help.
●Do not carry this alone.

You matter too.

Step 11: Trust what you saw

There is often a moment where something changed. Your child may have become angry, shut down, or stopped acting like themselves.

That moment matters.

Your child may have been telling you something even before they had the words.

Step 12: Begin healing

Healing starts sooner than people think. It starts now.

Healing is not only counselling. It can also be emotional, physical, spiritual, and cultural.

●Counselling support.
●Cultural connection.
●Spiritual healing.
●Movement such as walking, gym, or self-defence.
●Confidence building and rebuilding safety in the body.

You cannot carry this alone, and you do not have to.

Who you tell, and who you don’t

You do not have to tell everyone. This is personal, sensitive, and your family’s business.

Not everyone will know how to support you. Some people may panic, judge, distance themselves, or say the wrong thing.

●Choose who you tell.
●Keep things private if needed.
●Take space from unsafe people.
●Focus on safe people, professional support, your child’s wellbeing, and your own strength.

Not everyone will walk this with you. But the right support will find you.

You are not alone

Support is available

You did not choose this. But you are choosing what happens next, and that matters. Mi'djam Woman stands with you, walks with you, and offers this guide as free support for families navigating an incredibly hard moment.

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Queensland Police: Online Reporting

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If you are ready to report but do not feel safe or comfortable speaking to someone over the phone, you can use this QR code to make a report online through the Queensland Police Service. It is private, it is at your own pace, and you are in control of what you share and when. There is no wrong way to take this step.